As you may know , HRH Miswathi III, the King of Swaziland is vising my 100 acres these days on an invitation of MR. yes, yes, MR invites and i end up paying for the visitors and host them too..so i had to take the King out of the piss last night ,yet again and thanks to some divine intervention he decided he's going to ditch his wives..hence moi didn't have to organize 05 luxury buses to tag along the Royal wives..since the King has few dozen of them (actually its 13 to be bit more exact-one left the Royal harem not too long ago alleging she was "subjected to physical and emotional abuse" ) , and most of them are here with him, its up to me to sort them out too..admin that is..the rest, the King will do..
Mind you..I'm not racist but i don't want any monkey business ,even with a Royal Wife of a country where AIDS is more widespread in percentage than any other nation on earth (apart from Toilet Nadu-since they think they live in heaven,hence not even consider them to be a part of India!!)
Anyway, we (King and I) had a good time last night..as usual we hit the White Horse for some cheap drinks before we hit the 'The Bar' at the Dutch Hospital.funny, when i told the HRH Dude we're off to Dutch Hosp.,he inquired if we are going to 'do' some voluptuous Dutch blond nurses at the hosp., but then i dreaded for a minute not to hurt Sri Lanka's budding diplomatic relations with Kingdom of Swaziland and tell the guy the Dutch were long gone and what we may find there is Mahela's extra expensive Crabs (sure to make you crap when you see the prices of dishes there) and the Bar, the Bar thats becoming THE regular watering hole for Colombians of quite younger (and tender) age.
The HRH dude lit up like a Christmas tree mounted on the front yard of Last Chance showroom down Rajagiriya.
And then came the bombshell.. the HRH King just rolled a joint and passed it to me.. man i tell you this joint was like having ...err.. Swaziland Gold!
Yes, the more intellectual types here might wonder what the hell is 'Swaziland Gold' i talk about.. well pls read this here by Lydia Polgreen on New York Times of Today (see you wanker.. i read NY Times too! imagine that!!!) and you you'll be a world authority on Sawazi Gold.
What Daily News is not reporting is the fact that MR had not asked my mad the King about the details of his Ludzidzini Royal Village in Swaziland (because MR doesn't want such thing in Medamulana) nor any spicy details about the selection process for the Royal Wives (since MR already got a wife,he's not interested in any more-i guess!) but moi being the curious type got to know that normally around 50,000 young virgins (yako..Virgins!!! imagine that!!! 50 frigging thousand of them???) turn up for the selection gig ..bare-breasted and in skimpy traditional skirts.. i guess even if your not the King, it must be a spectacle more fitting than the London Olympics to watch 24/7 !!!
I read this blog article about the selection and to quote one candidate " "I want to live a nice life, have money, be rich, have a BMW and cellphone," summs up all the hype behind this selection.i mean, lets be serious ..in a country where ADIS is going to hit 100% within the next decade ( according to some UNDP doomsday report- but then, who will believe UNDP) its going to be a pretty good deal to be one of the 13 Royal Wives and thus not run the risk of going for an arranged marriage and end up like Freddy Mercury.
Wednesday, August 15, 2012
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